How come these modern girdles have names like “Spanx”, and “Assets”? Those names make them sound provocative, and young, as if wearing them would make one more sexy. When I hear, “Spanx” I think, “Oh, something you wear that would make someone want to spank you”. But if you were actually wearing Spanx, you probably wouldn’t want anyone touching you because then their hand would come in contact with a -too-firm ass. The “Assets” name is just the Target version of Spanx which are equally decieving, “Assets” sounds sexy, I think, “Ooh, Ass!” But then it’s the same problem, when I’m wearing them I don’t feel sexy, I feel trapped.
Looks like “Underalls” had it right. Not too sexy of a name for a product that does a not too sexy job.
The ad is pretty funny though.

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